Day 9 - still amazed at the the battle...

Wow... had a great day, cleaned my van, and car, cleaned out cupboards and pantry, moved things around to better organize how things are done.... and still.  Even after a brownie and ice cream, I'm craving diet coke and that's a mental thing not physical.  Cleaning the car and the house with no diet coke.... such a thing has never happened up till last week and it's really affecting my mind when I want to run and grab a cold glass of bubbling fizzy diet coke and ice but am not allowed to enjoy that any longer.

My friend Lana said yesterday on facebook that it was that feeling that you deserve it and that's so true for me.  Truely it was an addiction, a comfort food.... easy to get and nobody questioned it beyond letting you know that pop in general or more specifically diet coke was bad for you because of the aspartame.  I drank it when I was happy, bored, tired, depressed, sad, excited, celebrating, mad, you name it... drank it to get through trips, housecleaning and even childbirth... yes I had one the minute I delivered both Zachary and Derikkah much to the nurses dismay!  Some babies I drank it through labor, tried to quit during pregnancy but when blood pressure dropped, decided why not and it helped.  I was rarely seen without one in my hand joking that if I drank booze, I'd be an alcoholic.  In fact, that was something mom and I joked about before when we drank Pepsi!    I've had at least 35 of my 45 years as a almost exclusive pop drinker so why wouldn't I be going through mental anguish right now at Day 9?!

So after all of that wonderful work filled day getting deep cleaning done that's needed doing for weeks but time and energy prevented me from just doing it.... I'm sitting on my bed begging Derk for a diet coke?!  Of course he says no... He's quit real coke for as long as I have diet and he knows my battle.  HE is not about to give in and let me have one now... and I think it's because I've been off it so long that I really feel like I'm deprived and safe from addiction to it, when inside I KNOW I'm not!  I totally get people trying to quit smoking or drugs or alcohol... there's too many triggers... too many normal everyday situations where that was the the habit only now.... you can't buy that, order that... go there... do that...sigh....

Physically?  I'm not hungry.  That's the most noticible thing I think I've noticed about this.  I'm NOT hungry.  I have to almost force myself to eat supper when in the past I could go all day without eating but not supper....and also, I'm hungrier in the morning and at noon, but still, can't seem to get much down.  I'm not interested in sweets as much either although I admit if you serve it to me... I'll eat it, but still... I gave away my last piece of turtle cheesecake to my son this afternoon and he looked at me like I was insane!  lol.

I'm losing some weight too.... haven't measured again yet... don't have working scales and probably won't for awhile either.  My littles love them waaaaay too much and tend to break every set we buy so we haven't for a while.  Besides... Derk's weight loss has been measured by doctor's appts and the fact that his pants won't stay up and his pant legs are big enough for two people in them.  He's gone down 4 pant sizes so far... and he's still losing.

My weight loss is measured only and at last measurement on Tuesday was about an inch here or there.  All I know is my clothes fit looser.  If only I could get myself to drink more during the day.  I'm feeling faint, panicky at times and depressed or angry at the drop of a hat.  Guess the temper is still there even once the red hair is gone eh?   I'm nauseated most of the day which isn't fair since I've spent about 7.5 years of my marriage feeling this way due to pregnancy but then.... I got a baby in the end... AND diet coke... now I get neither.  Derk and my friends assure me this will pass.  I sure hope so... and soon!

See below for a list of side effects. I have so many of these it's not even funny.  I know people debunk this all the time, but this is the very reason I'm blogging about this as I experience it.  I don't know what to think... but I know how awful I felt or feel now, and figure either way I'll be helping my health and proving one or the other camp wrong!

Aspartame Side Effects The components of aspartame can lead to a number of health problems, as you have read. Side effects can occur gradually, can be immediate, or can be acute reactions.

Aspartame Information: Aspartame Side Effects Aspartame Case Histories Artifical Sweeteners Phenylalanine Phenylketonuria Message Board Forum: Think you are having an aspartame reaction? Join Dr. Hull's aspartame message board forum and communicate with others! Ask Dr Hull Forum

According to Lendon Smith, M.D. there is an enormous population suffering from side effects associated with aspartame, yet have no idea why drugs, supplements and herbs don’t relieve their symptoms. Then, there are users who don’t ‘appear’ to suffer immediate reactions at all. Even these individuals are susceptible to the long-term damage caused by excitatory amino acids, phenylalanine, methanol, and DKP.
Adverse reactions and side effects of aspartame include:
Eye
blindness in one or both eyes
decreased vision and/or other eye problems such as: blurring, bright flashes, squiggly lines, tunnel vision, decreased night vision
pain in one or both eyes
decreased tears
trouble with contact lenses
bulging eyes
Ear
tinnitus - ringing or buzzing sound
severe intolerance of noise
marked hearing impairment
Neurologic
epileptic seizures
headaches, migraines and (some severe)
dizziness, unsteadiness, both
confusion, memory loss, both
severe drowsiness and sleepiness
paresthesia or numbness of the limbs
severe slurring of speech
severe hyperactivity and restless legs
atypical facial pain
severe tremors
Psychological/Psychiatric
severe depression
irritability
aggression
anxiety
personality changes
insomnia
phobias
Chest
palpitations, tachycardia
shortness of breath
recent high blood pressure
Gastrointestinal
nausea
diarrhea, sometimes with blood in stools
abdominal pain
pain when swallowing
Skin and Allergies
itching without a rash
lip and mouth reactions
hives
aggravated respiratory allergies such as asthma
Endocrine and Metabolic
loss of control of diabetes
menstrual changes
marked thinning or loss of hair
marked weight loss
gradual weight gain
aggravated low blood sugar (hypoglycemia)
severe PMS
Other
frequency of voiding and burning during urination
excessive thirst, fluid retention, leg swelling, and bloating
increased susceptibility to infection
Additional Symptoms of Aspartame Toxicity include the most critical symptoms of all
death
irreversible brain damage
birth defects, including mental retardation
peptic ulcers
aspartame addiction and increased craving for sweets
hyperactivity in children
severe depression
aggressive behavior
suicidal tendencies
Aspartame may trigger, mimic, or cause the following illnesses:
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
Epstein-Barr
Post-Polio Syndrome
Lyme Disease
Grave’s Disease
Meniere’s Disease
Alzheimer’s Disease
ALS
Epilepsy
Multiple Sclerosis (MS)
EMS
Hypothyroidism
Mercury sensitivity from Amalgam fillings
Fibromyalgia
Lupus
non-Hodgkins
Lymphoma
Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD)